Friday, March 4, 2011

Still making me smile

As I put my little buggers to bed tonight, I was thinking how much my dad would have loved these two little guys.   I am really sorry they all never got a chance to meet.

This weekend it will be 6 years since we lost my dad to a brain tumor.  It's just sad, that's a lousy way to go.  But I have to say my dad really lived every day of his life to the fullest.  Maybe not always the best way, but he did his whole life his way.

The things that make me smile when I think of him still are

  • When I was little he used to drive a VW Bug and I would hear him driving home and I would run to meet him at the end of the driveway and we would go get Slurpee's at 7-11
  • On Christmas Eve he would come in our rooms and tell us if we were still awake Santa was going to pass by.  
  • He carried ALL of our ski equipment!!!  Bitched about it the whole time but did carry it from the parking lot.
  • His DRIVING was insane but entertaining to watch (as long as you were following him)
  • His singing to the radio
  • How he would sweat like a slob dancing at weddings, but always had a golf shirt in his car to change into.
  • His Yoddle was hilarious 
  • He knew one song on the piano (Michael Row the Boat Ashore) and never missed an opportunity to play it.
  • How he would smile when we made him proud.
The list could go on and on.  I choose to remember the things that make me smile today, because when I tell my boys about him I want them to know how funny he was and happy he made a lot of people and how much he was loved.  He had his struggles and it's a shame he made a lot of the choices he made.  It doesn't change how much we all love him and miss him.

I wasn't a mom when I lost my dad and I can't imagine not being here for my kids.  I think my dad had a part in all of that.  Last year when I was diagnosed with Breast Cancer and when through my mastectomy and hysterectomy I think my dad watching down from wherever he is and made my pain level tolerable and my recovery fairly easy, and that I am cancer free for nearly a year now.  That's what I like to think.

So much has happened in the 6 years since he's been gone, seems like a lifetime.  There are so many things that would make him happy, and I feel bad he missed so much.  My faith tells me and I believe that he is in a better place and we will all be together again someday.  Miss you dad, and love you.

Thanks for reading


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